personal, travel

Simala Church: Wishes Do Come True

“Have you ever thought of someone like you’ve never thought of someone before?

During my recent trip, I decided to actually find myself and get connected on what my inner voice is saying.  I’ve been blinded for quite some time trying to push on some things that are not even working out and I’m talking not just about relationships but career as well. I’ve been out of tune for quite some time and still in search of life’s great meaning. So I went to Simala Church, one of the most miraculous churches in the country wherein most of those who believe got their wishes come true. I must say that I’m not really a devotee nor religious. I can describe myself as someone who believes in a Supreme Being but not a total fan of Christian traditions. I don’t even read all chapters in the bible. I just believe in God and in goodness to others. To cut the long story short, I decided to take my chances in Simala. I need divine intervention to sort my chaotic life. I know I needed this trip.

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Last March 12, I flew to Cebu and rushed to the South Cebu Terminal to catch the bus going to Sibonga where Simala Shrine is located.  Fare costs at around P63 if I recall it perfectly for an air-conditioned bus. It’s a 2-hour and a half trip where I get the chance to use Google maps for the first time. I am a bit alarmed since the church is only open until 6pm and I was on the bus at 3pm due to heavy traffic from Mactan Airport to the bus terminal.

I am glad that I was able to arrived in the nick of time. Habal habals are available on the main road and they’ll be the ones to take you to the shrine for 20 pesos. It was a perfect time for me to contemplate especially that the shrine is so beautiful at dusk.

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I lit my colored candles for a specific purpose and prayed.

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I lit 5 candles because I know I needed it.

Black ( for souls ):  My uncle recently died during my mom’s birthday and I am surprised at the same time saddened of his death.  He is really funny and very nice to me. I love him so much.

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I also prayed for my other uncle who died last November. I asked for forgiveness since I was not able to provide him all he wants. I am still starting to save up for my future and been into a lot of financial problems due to family matters that I need to resolve.

Green (prosperity ):  I wanted to be financially stable and start to work on my future. I know I needed this to provide my family’s wants.

Gold (health): I prayed for my mom’s health to be better as I want her to still see her future grandchild. I must admit I’m not into getting married as of the moment but I wanted my mom to at least be able to see me stable and raise a family I can call my own.

White ( Guidance ): My life seems to be pointing nowhere and until now I don’t know how to deal with it. I’m starting to give up and surrender the steering wheel to God for I am headed into damnation. It’s been like this for years already.

Red ( Love ) : Being single starts to be uncomfortable at this age. I’m starting to question my own worth, my personality and the likes. It’s exasperating to keep on thinking what I need to change in order to attract someone. I’ve keep on praying and wishing that someone will see me more than a friend but God keeps on denying those prayers. It’s been years full of false hopes but still nothing. I start asking myself why, why am I not worth the words?  Am I not good enough?  The belief I have on myself has been clouded with uncertainties. I questioned my being. I started to feel the blues plus the fear of growing up alone. I decided to surrender this time, to lay my hopes unto God’s feet and let him decide on what’s best for me. I prayed to find him, the one who’ll make me believe that it’s okay to love and be love.

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It is one perfect view to indulge into while my thoughts drift into nothingness. Various thoughts were clouding my mind and I just let it happen, I let those thoughts overflow because I know it’s my needed break.

Travelling back to Cebu City made me feel fulfilled because I was able to go to Simala alone. It’s true that in order for us to connect we must disconnect for the mean time.

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Travelling alone gives you the chance to know more about yourself, it makes you feel so independent and brave. It’s a tough act to follow and I want to experience it all over again. I never trusted myself that much for quite some time due to fear that I might get lost.

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It’s a chaotic world we got here and I realized that I should slow down and feel all the adventures as well as my misadventures. I should be positive and trust God for he knows what is best for me.

For now, I give up. I’ll let him take the lead.

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I never thought of someone as much as I’ve thought of someone right now. Is he the one?  I hope so.

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03/23 – Day9: What Makes God Smile?

Source: http://i.ytimg.com/vi/Nog7oZJ_DbY/hqdefault.jpg

Today, I am actually feeling crazier than I used to. It’s like feeling mad with actually no reason to or maybe just feeling a little annoyed by someone. I had great dreams for the past 2 days already, thank you Lord my comprehensive exam is over I can now focused back with my life and my work which I am no longer so interested unlike before. It’s not hell, it’s limbo… I am a troubled soul. All I want is to forget but how? How can I forget if where I am right now reminds me of a love I don’t think I deserve. The past week, I feel so free and I realized that it’s hard yet I am able to forget because I don’t see him, I don’t get to talk to him then I can be that cold person I used to be. I am normal not the person I am in the office. I am that dreamy person wishing that maybe someday he’ll change and be more mature but I guess I was wrong and I need to be totally awaken by my delusions. He is not willing to tell me those words I wanted to hear and actions are just mainly crappy because assumptions my dear is just the root of all fucked ups. Geez. I am sorry, this is just me. With this, I know I am not making God smile. I am so sorry, God. I am such a disappointment.

Moving on to my reflections on my ninth day in this spiritual journey, we all need to make God smile with the things that we do. There are 5 ways to make God smile. Here you go:

  1. God smiles when we love him supremely. 
  2. God smiles when we trust him completely.
  3. God smiles when we obey him whole-heartedly.
  4. God smiles when we praise him and thank him continuously.
  5. God smiles when we use our abilities.

Never cease to make God smile. Aside from loving a person, love God above all else because he rewards those who loved him with all their heart and soul. My life is a little bit jaded right now but I will completely trust God even if there are times when my life doesn’t make sense at all. I have this faith that if I lay all my plans to God, he’ll work it all out and do what is really best for me. I will just continue to obey his words completely and exactly. With God, I should have no rooms for doubts and regrets. I will also not stop on thanking God for bringing out the best in me all the time and enjoy what he has done in my life. I could never repay the goodness he have showered upon me.

Thank you and I hope I made you smile no matter how crazy I can be.

May the Lord smile upon you…” Numbers 6:25 (NLT)

Last request… Lord, while you are working on the succeeding chapters of my life, can you help me sort out my love life too. I wish to find someone who will be able to cope up with my madness. Open my eyes to the realities, I need you to help me out in my decisions. Thy will be done.

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03/22 – Day 8: Planned For God’s Pleasure

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It is true, we are planned for God’s own delight. He takes pleasure in everything that we do and we should also remind ourselves of that. God intended us to live in this world because not just he want us to glorify him alone but for us to take care of his creations. We should enjoy our stay on Earth and bring that enjoyment to God because that is our purpose. We need to worship God everyday. We need to thank him for our lives. Worshiping God do not necessarily mean that we sing it, that we go to the church every time but it’s about recalling God in everything that we do. It is not about music, not about a tune — it is a lifestyle. Anything that you do that glorifies God is an act of worship.