I am creating web pages again after like a hundred years — kidding the only difference is I am not doing it for my Web Design subject but just for the sake of doing it to help me out somehow at work. 🙂
Seriously, I remembered how badly I want to be a graphic and web designer back in college but I just feel that I am not competent enough to pursue it as a career after I graduated. I never dream to be a programmer but I do dream to be a designer. I blame my low-tech computer and slow internet connection on why my dreams did not push through. I know it is not too late and that is why I am trying again and this time I will never stop. Maybe a year from now, I will learn a new language — not Japanese or French but I am talking about ASP, JAVA, and Drupal. I will also play around with some useful scripts and again I am not referring to the scripts that our favorite celebrities used to review before their shoot. Anyways, I am just happy. There is that certain kind of joy when my ideas come into life. It’s like an assurance that somehow I am not an epic fail still.
I want to learn more to do more and be more. I am tired of doing same things all over again because that is not me. I hate too much complacency and monotony. My life is more on taking risks, random adventures, learning new stuffs and just a life seeking for happiness and meaning. I don’t need to prove my worth because I don’t care at all. My toughest competitor is myself. I challenge myself to try different things and this time trying to push myself away from my comfort zone. I don’t fret because in every failure there’s a lot of lessons to ponder upon. I don’t live to set people’s expectation – I live because I have a purpose and that is my mission to find my life’s meaning. I don’t live just to exist – I exist because I dared to live.
This time I begin to dream again. 😉